Brant's Blog of Awesomeness

UPDATED WITH TWO HINTS! The Official List of Wrong "Secret Sound" Guesses So Far (T.O.L.W.S.S.G.S.F.)

You can hear the "Secret Sound" sometime between 6 and 6:30 every morning.  If you can guess what it is (after we play it, we'll take the eighth caller's guess) you will win THIS fabulous prize package:

Four WAY-FEST tickets!  AND laser hair removal!  From Renu Skin Center!

Many stations would give you only one or the other.  We give you both. 

Because we care.

Anyway, the wrong answers thus far:

A lid on a pot, a closing door, a nailgun, a jack-in-the-box, a notebook hitting a floor, a rubber band hitting a box, stable gun, binder being slammed shut, toaster popping out, table tennis paddle, boomstick hitting a desk...

NO ONE HAS YET FIGURED IT OUT.  So, Friday, we gave you a brilliant hint: 

"deuce"

And, here's another hint, since we didn't get it this morning (Tuesday) -- "love".

Hope that helps...

a

* -- Please ignore this picture of a robot.  It's unrelated.

It's a Diet Fork.

 

a

It's a Diet Fork.  The Diet Fork costs about a buck a fork.  It's a plastic fork.

It's a Diet Fork because it has "dulled teeth", which makes it harder to pick stuff up.

It's Diet Fork because it has a smaller "surface area", which makes stuff fall off.

It's a Diet Fork because the handle is "uncomfortable", which makes it harder to hold the fork.

It's a Diet Fork because, by making it hard to pick stuff up, and making stuff fall off, it "makes dieting fun".

It's a Diet Fork, because it's a fork that doesn't work.

Thank you, makers of Diet Fork.

Shaun Groves Sings the Song You Wrote

You wrote it, now he performs it.

Here's Shaun Groves, performing "It's Hard to Be a Christian on 95", a song composed by WAY-FM listeners live on Friday morning's show.  Lyrics:

It's hard to be a Christian on 95

If only these people would learn how to drive

I wish my Jesus fish wasn't so hard to hide

It's hard to be a Christian on 95

It's hard to be a Christian on 95

I'm keepin' my eyes open, but prayin' to survive

Lord, save me from this snowbird -- she's a-driftin' left to right

It's hard to be a Christian on 95.

One Amazing YouTube Video

Here's Wintley Phipps, with a little music lesson...

Video of Shaun Groves in Studio

Here's Shaun Groves, in studio, performing "Flea Market Montgomery".

We turned it into a duet.  It sounded like Wham.  I'm sorry about that.

My very bad Bono impression is at 2:50. 

You'll wonder how either one of us makes a living.  Please note that Producer Nikki is unamused, and nervously looking for the door.

Hansen Family Trades Bird for Most of a Dog

Just before the trade deadline, we traded our bird for a dog.  The bird had some problems.  The dog has some problems.  The bird was livin' on volume 10.  The new dog is livin' on three legs.  The bird screeched constantly.  The new dog yelps with PTSD. 

Even swap.  The kids are happy enough.  Meeko has a great new family, friends of ours, so we can still see him.

The sum total number of dog legs in our home (TDL) can now be expressed as follows: TDL = 2X - 1  Given X as the default legs per unit (4)

His name is Nigel.  Nigel Tufnel Hansen, in full.  He's a mutt from Animal Aid in Ft. Lauderdale.  Somebody hit him with a car.  Like me, Nigel is a misfit/widdle cuddle machine.

Tell the fam to skip Disney World.  When they come to Florida, they should check this out:  Even though Nigel is missing a rear leg, he manages to lift the other leg when he does his business.  It's stunning.  He balances on his front two paws and pees.  It's like Cirque Du Soleil, except it doesn't scare me.

Awesome Caption Contest!

a

a

a

a

a

a

a

Okay, I'm clearly powerfully ministering to these African children.

...but what are they saying to each other?

Most entertaining caption idea wins.  Nikki will determine this, so I don't have to take the blame.

FAQ:

Q:  Is it okay to mock Brant with this?

A:  Yes.  Bonus points.

Q:  What's the prize?

A: Something awesome.

Q:  So you don't have a prize yet, do you? 

A:  That's correct.

How to Help Peru

Here's the story, and here's an idea: Samaritan's Purse.

All the contact info is in the links.  Some good news from Compassion International here.

Dog Adoption Info from this Morning

We spoke to Tamara with "Animal Aid" in Oakland Park.  Check out the website for info in adopting a dog -- they've got a LOT of them, all shapes and sizes:

www.animal-aid.com

954.730.8398

Pump Up the...Sermon...or Something

My friend Fay sent me this.  She said she thought it was going to be kinda lame, but then she heard it, and liked it.

Me, too.  I actually like the Tony Evans "Frankenstein" mix. 

Producer Nikki didn't really like it.  So -- obviously -- I turned it up.